It started with a craving for a hot fudge sundae.
Jason was watching football so I hopped in my car and headed to Braum's. I plugged in my iPod and started picking out random songs to listen to (and sing to, if nobody can hear me then it's not cruel and unusual punishment for anyone but me). While I was on my way back home I started listening to "All That I Can Say" by the David Crowder Band. It's no coincidence that it's also the title of my blog. I was listening to this song a lot last year after our miscarriage. Thanks to a woman out there who poured her heart and soul out on her blog after the passing of her son Isaac, I decided a blog may be a therapeutic way for me to get out all those feelings I had but didn't know what to do with. She also had this song on her playlist. So here I am, blessed beyond words to be pregnant, and I am sobbing in my car because my heart just hurt so much. It hurt for the loss that we went through, the child we don't have here with us, the guilt that I feel for being so happy about this baby. I know in my heart that no children we have will ever replace or first. Our angel. Then there is the twin we lost in this pregnancy. Very early on, before we ever knew we were pregnant with twins, but ours just the same. So to my angels, I love you with all my heart and I miss you.
These are my footprints,
so perfect and so small.
These tiny footprints
never touched the ground at all.
Not one tiny footprint,
for now I have wings.
These tiny footprints
were meant for other things.
You will hear my tiny footprints,
in the patter of the rain.
Gentle drops like angel's tears,
of joy and not from pain.
You will see my tiny footprints,
in each butterflies' lazy dance.
I'll let you know I'm with you,
if you just give me the chance.
You will see my tiny footprints,
in the rustle of the leaves.
I will whisper names into the wind,
and call each one that grieves.
Most of all, these tiny footprints,
are found on Mommy and Daddy's hearts.
'Cause even though I'm gone now,
We'll never truly part.
so perfect and so small.
These tiny footprints
never touched the ground at all.
Not one tiny footprint,
for now I have wings.
These tiny footprints
were meant for other things.
You will hear my tiny footprints,
in the patter of the rain.
Gentle drops like angel's tears,
of joy and not from pain.
You will see my tiny footprints,
in each butterflies' lazy dance.
I'll let you know I'm with you,
if you just give me the chance.
You will see my tiny footprints,
in the rustle of the leaves.
I will whisper names into the wind,
and call each one that grieves.
Most of all, these tiny footprints,
are found on Mommy and Daddy's hearts.
'Cause even though I'm gone now,
We'll never truly part.
3 comments:
hugs....
from across the ocean! (I hit enter too soon!)
I know your angels are watching over you. Sending big hugs and thinking of you always :)
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